Balancing Leadership and Vulnerability, feat. Melissa Hurrington, CFO and VP of Operations at Premiere Claims
TLC 11.27.24 Melissa Hurrington fcp
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[00:00:00]
Layci Nelson: [00:01:00] Hello, friends, and welcome back to Confessions of a Terrible Leader. I'm your host and former terrible leader, Layci Nelson. I am thrilled to have Melissa Harrington on the show today. I gotta admit up front, I'm kind of a little fangirly here, and I don't say that easily. the algorithm knew I needed to know who she was.
Layci Nelson: And so, found Melissa, or Melissa found me, I guess, on LinkedIn, I don't know how that works. Melissa, I loved your content. I love your content. It immediately attracted me. it is so enticing and we need more of it but who the heck is this woman for our listeners? She Is the cfo and vp of
Layci Nelson: operations at premiere
Layci Nelson: that cited us for the next 100. She's very much about female leadership empowerment Also, I think what's really unique is you don't see many people with cfo and ops saying hey There's [00:02:00] a lot of leadership that's critical that can be done from these seats and I Hate Love that you're like, no, no, no, no.
Layci Nelson: We are leading whether we want to be or not. Let's just make sure we're leading in a way that is doing the best for the people. And of course, we're in complete alignment. So I've talked way too much already. Welcome. I'm so glad you're here.
Melissa Hurrington: Thank you so much for having me. I love becoming in real life friends.
Melissa Hurrington: Yes. Yeah. With some of my internet friends. Excellent.
Layci Nelson: It's so fun to connect. I'm confident we're going to end up meeting up and crossing paths in real life somewhere. Same here. Tell us a little bit, if you want to just give our listeners a little bit about if you were going out to coffee and we were like, Melissa, What are you all about?
Layci Nelson: We're just having a, not super professional networking, more of like a human to human connection, right? Yeah, what am I gonna learn about
Melissa Hurrington: you? Oh, gosh, who knows where that story and conversation would [00:03:00] go for sure I'm down for anything just along for the ride. But at the end of the day, I like to say i'm a wife I'm a mom.
Melissa Hurrington: I have a seven year old daughter and a ten year old son who are the light of my lives You And I am all of those things before I am a CFO and VP of operations and. I'm sure we would talk a lot about that, but who I am as a human is probably a little bit stubborn. A lot of willpower, a challenger, a trailblazer, naturally.
Melissa Hurrington: I'm sure it's everything that drove my parents crazy as they were raising me, but man, I think women belong in all places where decisions are made, and that's very much a Who I am as a human I am Happy to fight the fight and there is nothing more that I want to see Than this glass ceiling completely shattered into pieces That's one of my favorite conversations.
Melissa Hurrington: My second favorite conversation is the fact that I [00:04:00] have debilitating imposter syndrome Every single day when I show up to work when I show up to a podcast Whatever it may be certainly before I step foot on a stage anywhere I wonder if this is the moment that everybody's going to find out. I have no idea what I am doing
Layci Nelson: I think probably everyone listening can relate to that at least on some level.
Layci Nelson: I know I certainly can Oh, man, okay So I want so many things the oh man is so many things that i'm excited to ask you about and talk about Let's start with In your role as CFO, as VP of operations, like you're making decisions that are impacting so many people every single day. How functionally in the nitty gritty, like day to day, because we like to speak in big, broad strokes, right?
Layci Nelson: Of like, Oh, we want people to bring their whole selves to work. We want them to put their family first. We want them to all of the things we know that we feel like we're supposed to say, right? As leaders [00:05:00] that are trying to lead into this new era. Really lean into Respecting all people belonging all of those things which I really believe in It's so much easier to say it than it is to actually do it day to day when someone's Personal needs are not in alignment with the current needs of what's happening in the organization at the moment So how from your seat in leadership speak to me about how do we like really do this?
Melissa Hurrington: When it gets hard it is hard. It's not when it gets hard You It is hard. There's different degrees of hard, but man, this shit is hard. 365 days a year, it doesn't matter if it's year end or budget season or whatever. You know, your peak season for sales, whatever it may be, it is hard. Certainly being a working mother is an interesting complication.
Melissa Hurrington: Mm hmm. To everything, but I think step one is to stop pretending like we have [00:06:00] it all together. Mm hmm. That if you can pull down the facade and realize that it's not perfect. Mm hmm. There is no true work life balance. What is balance? It's a give and take and it depends on the moment. I will say my daughter had a tonsillectomy the middle of October.
Melissa Hurrington: We work property insurance claims at the end of the day. Which means two hurricanes made landfall within two weeks of each other. That's about as peak season as you can get for us as a company. I would imagine. My daughter had a tonsillectomy and I was out of office available for two weeks during her recovery.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah, So pulling down the facade that we have it all together. I Heard this saying a long time ago It was a video and probably tiktok or something like that, but well this predates tiktok I've never been able to find it again So somebody finds it send a link to me because it's not original to me, but [00:07:00] it was revolutionary for me of Life is a juggling act And it is all about you are going to drop balls Yep, it's going to happen And so it is all about which of those balls are rubber and can bounce, and which ones are glass and can shatter.
Melissa Hurrington: Yes. So you can do it, you just have to be clear of what your priorities are at the time. I think the biggest thing that's gotta go is this Monday through Friday 9 to 5 culture. Yes. Life doesn't get to happen outside of Monday through Friday from 9 to 5. My daughter can't have tonsil surgery outside of those hours.
Melissa Hurrington: You don't have mental health crises outside of those hours. You don't get sick outside of those hours. Doctors aren't even open outside of those hours, right? Whatever it may be the push and the pull I don't text fight with my husband outside of those hours right
Melissa Hurrington: So it's about knowing What has to take the [00:08:00] priority?
Melissa Hurrington: As a leader, it's being really clear about what the expectations are. Yes. I can meet expectations. I'm just not gonna meet them by Friday at 5 o'clock in this clock in, clock out culture. Right. And that's what balance looks like. Yeah. And it's not always negative things. My son plays travel baseball, and if there's travel baseball parents, you just, you know.
Melissa Hurrington: If you know, you know, it's chaos, right? I've never missed a single pitch of his games before and his games do not happen outside of monday through friday from eight to five from nine to five, whatever that may be So I'm gonna be there on a Thursday at 3 p. m., I will be there by the first pitch, and if that means I have to get out my laptop that night at 9 p.
Melissa Hurrington: m., I'm gonna meet expectations. That's easy for me as a leader. What does that look like for the people below me? [00:09:00] Right. You have to be clear on what those expectations are, and then give them the autonomy to meet them, whatever way works for them. Yeah. Yeah. That was so much talking, Layci.
Layci Nelson: But it was so good.
Layci Nelson: And I also use that same analogy when I teach with the balls in the air. And I also do not know where it originated.
Melissa Hurrington: And
Layci Nelson: I love that you said, you know, how does this look for the people that are reporting to us, right? How do we make that happen for them and the reality of their jobs? And. Understanding that it's a dance and there's no, what works for six months might not work for the next six months, I think is helpful.
Layci Nelson: It's not permanent. Nothing is let's just let go of that. Okay. I have a question related to finance about the finance world in general. So one of the things, one of the trends that we've seen or has been told to us from people that are working in accounting CPAs, the world that you're in, Is that [00:10:00] the accounting profession does not have enough people coming into it?
Layci Nelson: Boy.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah.
Layci Nelson: Is that true?
Melissa Hurrington: It's so accurate.
Layci Nelson: Okay.
Melissa Hurrington: I would love your take as a finance professional. What's happening? Why are people not attracted to it as a career? It's not sexy. Honestly, I really think that's what it is. It's not sexy and it's not exciting and it doesn't feel cutting edge. Where are people Going you're going into the medical field.
Melissa Hurrington: They want to be the person that cures cancer They're going into ai and computer science and all of this stuff that feels so much more cutting edge and exciting And new and innovative and I think accounting has a little bit of a bad rap I don't know on the surface. It just feels so like 1992 office space Right from the outside looking in it sounds so painfully boring there's stereotypes of they're just the Difficult bean counters sitting in the [00:11:00] corner Leave me alone with my spreadsheets and my stapler It's evolved so much into this true strategic addition to the company.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah. I just don't think there's been good PR around it. Like it honestly just sounds so dull and boring and all these other things are so much more attractive. I can't imagine a 16, 17, 18 year old right now looking at all of their opportunities Add to it, you got the gig economy and all of those things, right?
Melissa Hurrington: I'm gonna Start my own business. I'm gonna get into ai i'm gonna develop apps. I'm gonna be a gamer I mean that that's a whole thing or yeah be a content creator. I'm gonna be an accountant It sounds awful, right? It sounds so Unexciting compared to just kind of the temperature of what's happening in the world.
Melissa Hurrington: That's my opinion. It is Uneducated and zero research just straight [00:12:00] instinct and opinion. So one of the things
Layci Nelson: I've heard and
Melissa Hurrington: I'm not in it. So I'm deferring to all of you that live and breathe this. We have heard that
Layci Nelson: the old school inflexibility of butts in the seats. Yeah. And What brought it to mind is when you talked about, you know, they need to meet expectations. If they can meet expectations, then we're fine. And it's my job to be explicitly clear about expectations. What are the outcomes I need?
Layci Nelson: When's your butt in the seat getting the job done? Some of the opinion I've heard is the old school grind mentality that has existed in accounting and the expectations for just long, grueling, especially around tax time, horrible hours. That's not doing any favors either.
Melissa Hurrington: What's your take on that? Is that accurate?
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah, I totally agree. Certainly in public accounting. And I feel like that's the standard track record. Or if you're going to go and get your CPA or Your undergrad or graduate degree in [00:13:00] it that you're probably gonna go work for a cpa firm for at least a little bit For experience and yeah, it's the billable hours mentality It's get as much out of this person before they burn out and move on mentality And the generations they demand something different They probably deserve something different.
Melissa Hurrington: It's time for a change and they're just the ones that Loud and bold enough to shout it from rooftops that tax season for five months out of the year, you're going to work 80 hours a week. People are just like, nah, no, thank you. I'm good. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Absolutely. So talk to me about
Melissa Hurrington: what does it mean to be a woman
Layci Nelson: in the industries? In the seats that you're in making big decisions having influence How do we those of us sitting in the position of like we really want to be? Breaking trail for those coming behind us and for us to shatter that [00:14:00] ceiling. Yeah What do we need to be doing?
Layci Nelson: In your experience To actually make that a possibility In a way it hasn't yet been realized
Melissa Hurrington: the number one thing holding women back are ourselves There's all the stats out there that women won't apply for a job unless they meet 100 percent of the requirements, and there is a tiktok, I love tiktok, just don't judge me, I love it, but there was a trend going around a while ago of women asking their male partners, boyfriends or husbands, Hey, all of the pilots on your commercial flight suddenly passed out, would you be able to land?
Melissa Hurrington: A boeing 737 and man after man after man after man was like Yeah, a thousand percent and they mean it. Yes, and they mean it and women were like, oh my god I could never like I haven't gone to seven years of school for it, right? So much of it is us Yeah, you can't get the job if you're not applying for it, right?
Melissa Hurrington: You can't get the [00:15:00] promotion if you're not advocating for yourself. Yep, men have no issue advocating for themselves Where women it's that imposter syndrome so many people experience it and it certainly is cross gender but women for sure So a we gotta stop doing that b. There's a lot of women in positions of power that are holding Women back I call it the crabs in a bucket mentality Yes, talk about that You know You got crabs in the bucket every single crab wants to use the shoulders of the crab behind them to get out of the bucket And everybody just stays in it So there's this idea that There's only going to be one woman at this table.
Melissa Hurrington: So it sure as shit better be me All the other bitches better get out of my way, right? Yep. There's for sure some of that happening There's systemic issues. I won't downplay it at all But I think the way that we can make the most Change and the most progress Is [00:16:00] work that we can do ourselves Mm hmm get a sponsor get an advocate Get somebody who is in the room where it's happening and that they're saying your name that they know that you are a badass Yes, stop downplaying the work that you do We are quick to give everybody else credit and not to say hell.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah, I did the damn thing. I'm awesome Yes, I did great work And men are doing it as they should. Truthfully, as they should. You should be proud of it. Boy, I could go all the way back to then how we raise our girls. But we were told, to not be full of ourselves, to be polite, to give everybody a chance, uh, be braggadocious, I'm sure that's not what my dad said, but some other way classier word than that.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah. I think that's the biggest thing is we got to do it. So interesting, really quick story. Yeah. I just recently launched with a partner, a [00:17:00] corporate women in Omaha networking group to come together, put all the badasses in one space, fuel the energy off each other. We just had our first event. At the end of the event, we were asking for feedback of like, what do you guys want this group to be?
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah. What do you want to see? And one of the women said, I think it'd be so cool to have interviews or conversations with notable women in Omaha. And my partner, Kelly Thompson, said, I'm going to stop you right there. These are the notable women in Omaha. Yes. And you saw everybody go, wait,
Melissa Hurrington: to get into the group, it's required that you are VP So these are women in positions of power, they have reached the top or damn near close to the top. And we were sitting in that room being like, gosh, it'd be just so cool to hear from somebody who's done it. Like, you're doing it. You're literally doing it.
Melissa Hurrington: Right now.
Melissa Hurrington: Yes. We can talk about the systemic issues. We can talk about, you got to [00:18:00] use your voice when you get the seat at the table. You have to invite other people to the table. You have to advocate for each other and say, like, I love your idea, Greg. It sounds really similar to the one that Layci just said. Yeah.
Melissa Hurrington: Or, like, Layci, I don't think you were done talking yet. Go back and say, Yeah. Finish your thought and then we'll get over to you or whatever it may be. There's so much soft stuff in there, so much advocacy that needs to happen, but nobody's coming to save us. We have to do it ourselves. Right.
Layci Nelson: God, I love it.
Layci Nelson: It is such a mindset shift to realize we are the women.
Melissa Hurrington: We are Let's make it
Layci Nelson: happen.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah,
Layci Nelson: one of the phrases I like to use for myself when i'm doing self talk to help myself up because i'm having imposter syndrome or Wondering
Melissa Hurrington: all the things, you know,
Melissa Hurrington: I
Layci Nelson: will repeat to myself. Why not me?
Melissa Hurrington: Yes.
Layci Nelson: Why not me?
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah
Melissa Hurrington: and
Layci Nelson: it took I mean i'm 40. How old am I almost 46? Nice It took [00:19:00] me years to realize that I even had a mindset problem. So I'm hoping that the younger generation can pick it up faster. Like take up space, take up space. That doesn't just mean sit man spread on the subway. It means like, yeah, confident in what you have to say and who you are and what you have to offer. Yep. And stop waiting. Stop waiting to think that you have to get a certain title before you're qualified to speak.
Layci Nelson: Into a room. Absolutely. , where do we start? We have a listener that's like I want to learn how to quote unquote take up space or how to come into that room and Realize we are the women of omaha they're your mentee you're sponsoring them and they're like melissa help me What's the first thing I need to do? What are you going to say
Melissa Hurrington: get a notebook?
Melissa Hurrington: The only thing you keep in that notebook is your list of accomplishments
Melissa Hurrington: You're accomplishing great things All day, every day as women, [00:20:00] I think human nature, but certainly as women, we certainly keep tally of all the things we didn't accomplish. Yeah. Oh, right. All day. Yep. I remind myself every day that I don't make a fresh dinner for my children and I'm not Susie homemaker.
Melissa Hurrington: That you keep tallies of that.
Melissa Hurrington: I'm responsible for the laundry at my household. It's my least favorite task. Never at the end of the week. I'm like, wow, how did you find time to do nine loads of laundry? But in my head, um, when's the last time you washed the curtains? It's been years. You're disgusting. Yeah. So keep track. I have a notebook. The only thing that's in there is all of the little stuff. And sometimes it's as silly as we have a small finance team and my accounting manager is currently out on an extended medical leave.
Melissa Hurrington: And I posted payroll on time this week. And it might not feel like much but haven't done that in some years. It's always on time. I have In years and I [00:21:00] did it on top of everything else the checks went out in the mail I posted payroll on time that it's not always these massive. I applied for this grant and got approved.
Melissa Hurrington: I Increased our profitability by x dollars write that stuff down, too But like, you are knocking it out of the park day after day after day after day. And then I keep a smile file. So every LinkedIn message that you've received, email you've received, that text message, whatever it is, for me, I love handwritten cards and people know that, so I tend to get a lot of them.
Melissa Hurrington: Every single one of those is saved and I'll print the stuff that's electronic and it's in my smile file. So then when I'm sitting there thinking. You're just the worst at this job and anybody else would be so much better than you anybody else You can go back and reference it. Yeah. Would anybody else have accomplished this?
Melissa Hurrington: At this point, my list is thousands of things long and this current notebook is just a little one. Yeah. Am I really that bad? [00:22:00] Look at all these other things that other people objectively are saying about me. I'm starting that. That's happening. Yeah. So to give something really tangible to take away, that's what we do.
Melissa Hurrington: I love that. Thank you. Well,
Layci Nelson: it is that time. To step into the confessional and share your story of a hard earned leadership lesson, usually out of a misstep, a mistake, something you would love to not have done, but you did, and how it shaped how you lead today. The floor is yours. What? Are you
Melissa Hurrington: bringing to us today?
Melissa Hurrington: Boy, I make missteps and mistakes every single day Me too to think of a big one the biggest mistake that i've made in the last five years Is that I was experiencing a miscarriage I didn't know I was pregnant until I was miscarrying but it Was bad Not even Emotionally for me at the time because again, I didn't even know it was happening and I thought those years were [00:23:00] like behind me So it wasn't even this large emotional toll.
Melissa Hurrington: It was physically awful multiple multiple multiple Er visits one thing led to another the thing went on for three months. I won't get into Horrible details of it but consistent. , As a leader Didn't want to bother anyone with it , so I did it quietly in the background as somebody who stands on the rooftop and shouts authenticity and you're a whole human and show up as yourself.
Melissa Hurrington: I was like, yeah, but not this part of yourself. Right. Right. But not me. Not for me. Not me. And I am someone that rarely calls in sick to work, good, bad, or indifferent. It's just not something I've ever done a whole heck of a lot. A lot of my employees have been with me for a lot of years. It's something that they saw out of characteristic for me.
Melissa Hurrington: I typically have really high energy levels and I physically had [00:24:00] nothing left to give. So I'm coming to work late. I'm leaving early because I'm in and out of the hospital. Yeah. And you haven't told them any of this? Do they have any clue? Nobody knows anything. And i'll tell you it was also a very tumultuous time At the company the details don't matter But in the seven years i've been with the company it was during the worst three months, of course, right?
Melissa Hurrington: Of the company which was a part of the reason why I thought I was I don't know being the hero And saying they need me. I just got to get through this and I didn't tell You Anyone
Melissa Hurrington: and almost every single one of my direct reports, I found out after the fact during that time had all but updated their resume or taking calls from recruiters because what they saw was somebody who was checked out and probably bitchy. For sure. Oh, yeah. When you got things going on in life, it's [00:25:00] really hard to care about that KPI.
Melissa Hurrington: Oh, yeah. Tell me more about that KPI, about how you and Brenda got into that fight last week. Right. You can't bring yourself to care. So what they saw was somebody that was checked out, didn't care anymore, was not investing much, if anything, into any of them. And when things got rough at the company, I didn't step up.
Melissa Hurrington: I stepped out here. I was thinking I'm going above and beyond. My life is on fire. Yeah. I have 0 percent to give and I'm somehow finding a way to show up and give all of it. All of it. Look at me over here knocking it out of the park. Yep. Uh, hero cape flapping. Yep. Needless to say it became one day very physically apparent that I was going through a miscarriage very publicly in front of the company at that point.
Melissa Hurrington: And it came out and everybody was like, Whoa. Yeah. What do you mean? now [00:26:00] everybody knows, and after the fact, it hurt relationships of, I'm hurt, you didn't feel like you could tell me this. Yeah. I thought we had this level of trust between us, and I guess we didn't, and I was like, oh my gosh, this was a negative thing I didn't think about.
Melissa Hurrington: And then people told me, I'm hurt. We knew you weren't you, we were so frustrated by you, and we were giving you damn near zero grace. Yep. Which is a lesson that they needed to learn, right? Right, they created a narrative that was not even close to the truth, yep. Yeah, that like as leaders we deserve grace as well.
Melissa Hurrington: Yep. But they were so frustrated by me. And I just should have told them, I should have been human and said, I only have 20 percent to give today, but I will give you my 20 percent how different that would have been. Then the dumpster is on fire floating down the river and you're just [00:27:00] gonna head out early. Got it. You're bailing on us. Yeah, don't worry.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah, we'll handle it from here
Melissa Hurrington: So they didn't trust me. They felt like I didn't trust them enough to tell this to them. They thought I was checked out
Melissa Hurrington: But ultimately all of that to say I talked so much about seeing my employees as human and as a leader I wasn't showing up as human.
Melissa Hurrington: They said now that we know Melissa, you just set an impossible standard for the rest of us. Yeah. Oh my god. Yes Is that what you expected me? Because now I'm calling in sick because my throat hurts. Right. And you're over here coming to work after you've been in the ER until 4am. right. Is that your expectation of me?
Melissa Hurrington: And I was like, of course not. Right. Never. Never. And they're like, well, then why were you holding yourself to that standard? So here I was thinking I was doing so much good, being this incredible [00:28:00] leader, facing physical battle and still showing up every day and I was doing so much harm and on that journey almost lost all of them.
Melissa Hurrington: Almost lost every single one of them. I have a fantastic group of direct reports and a larger team as a whole, but like my direct reports, they're a bit ride or die. We have each other's backs and the fact that they had each other is probably what kept them around during that time.
Melissa Hurrington: It was just like the biggest fall flat on my face moment of, you weren't being the hero. This was not the move and you don't have to give details, being authentic does not mean I had to go in and share gory details by any stretch of the imagination. It is a sensitive subject for a lot of people, but I have something going on at home.
Melissa Hurrington: I need a little bit of grace and [00:29:00] space. Hey, I got some medical things going on, and Yep. Some doctor's appointments and don't worry. I'll keep you guys updated. I got to focus on me right now Yes, how much further that would have gone than doing something just yes Secrecy.
Layci Nelson: first of all, thank you for sharing that because that is a very vulnerable story And I appreciate your willingness to talk about it because it's so real.
Layci Nelson: Yeah I resonate with it very deeply different path for myself that had to do with the death the loss of Someone but trying to just tough it out right like god what an idiot I was in
Melissa Hurrington: hindsight.
Layci Nelson: I love the reinforcement of You don't have to get into the full details, right for whatever reason But yeah, just giving enough of an insight of I know i'm off You I've got something going on. Whatever level of comfort you're willing to
Melissa Hurrington: [00:30:00] disclose.
Layci Nelson: Unfortunately, we'll probably have the opportunity to, do it again, but to do it differently. I had a two year split between my idiocracy and then learning some things.
Layci Nelson: The way that they rally around you when you are just a tiny bit. Vulnerable and honest.
Layci Nelson: I'm
Melissa Hurrington: not a crier and it gets me choked up thinking about yeah, and I've had that moment
Melissa Hurrington: my Daughter, Layla has a Food allergy a severe one. It is lethal I just crushed it as a parent and gave her her allergen She went into anaphylactic shock gave her her epi pen. We went to the hospital. She's totally fine Okay, um Being very black and white about it because I don't want to get sidetracked because I was not okay.
Melissa Hurrington: Went to the hospital, we got home at like 2 a. m. I think, like that stuff takes forever. She was so fine because EpiPen saved lives. We knew what to do. We were prepared for it. We handled it. The next morning, she woke up. The girl is a [00:31:00] no limit soldier. She doesn't need sleep. She woke up at 5 a. m. And it's like, Mom, I pulled my tooth. And she's definitely terrified of pulling her teeth out, like, it's trauma in our household. And she had pulled her own tooth. And she's like, I have to go to school. And I said, okay, I, we just got home from the hospital. Are you sure? I wasn't ready to send her back out into the world.
Melissa Hurrington: Yeah. And she was like, uh, I gotta go tell my bestie Lydia that I pulled my tooth, right? Clearly. I sat there for a second and said, Why am I going to let my anxieties hold her back? If she's ready, she's ready. So I was prepared to call into work that day. And then I stood in my driveway. The school bus literally picks up in our driveway.
Melissa Hurrington: So I'm standing in my driveway. She gets on the bus. I turn into a total puddle because I was so fine in the moment because I could control it. It happened at our dining room table. I was the one that gave it to her. It was on me, all the things in my head. Is the school going to react in the same way? She goes to the after school [00:32:00] program.
Melissa Hurrington: Is a teenager going to notice? Are they going to do it fast enough? Total puddle. Mom guilt. Yeah, of course. I'm the one that did it. All of the things. I was not okay. No, my team knows Layla well, they know she comes to the office all the time and they know about her allergy and her history there and I committed to learning.
Melissa Hurrington: From the previous experience, and I sent them this exact text. Layla went into anaphylactic shock last night. She is okay. I am not. I will be completely unavailable today. Mm. I then went and I hiked. I had to go put some sun on my face. Sit in the quiet. It was the first time I'd ever truly taken a mental health day.
Melissa Hurrington: I suppose you could call it Yeah,
Melissa Hurrington: the level of support I got we do a lot of texting in our company This group text would come in and people are like melissa's off today. I got it I'll come talk to you right now before I could even think twice about it All over their email, I think they [00:33:00] probably accomplished more in that day, just to make sure we got it.
Melissa Hurrington: Go do what you have to do. But what I was most surprised by, I was not surprised by them stepping up. Fantastic team. The amount of messages I got of Melissa, you don't know how much that text meant to me. I'm so proud of you. Mmm. You just gave me grace. Yeah. Permission to give myself grace when I need to.
Melissa Hurrington: I was feeling really anxious about taking an X, Y, and Z day off or whatever else, like you just gave me permission that it was okay to not be okay. Yeah. There was more power in me not showing up to work that day, being honest that I wasn't okay than what I have honestly accomplished on a Tuesday in the office.
Melissa Hurrington: Right. When I wasn't mentally there. I wasn't gonna move the needle forward in any way, and lesson learned, I [00:34:00] probably was gonna do more damage than good. Yep, because when you are in that place again, like I just can't care about the issue that you're having right now Yeah, my daughter could have died last night.
Melissa Hurrington: I don't care. I cannot
Layci Nelson: care
Melissa Hurrington: right now Yeah, and I would have given that type of energy to it. No matter how fantastic of a leader. I think I am Oh 100 percent. So I was glad that I learned the lesson And I was glad that I learned to do it differently going forward You
Layci Nelson: Thank you for sharing that.
Layci Nelson: That is so powerful. So real.
Layci Nelson: So many great takeaways of all the reasons why if we do not allow ourselves to be visibly human, where they can see it,
it
Layci Nelson: doesn't matter. We could talk until we are blue in the face. They are not going to believe that we mean it. We have to do it in line of sight, right? Wow. What a story. Thank you for sharing that with us.
Layci Nelson: Listeners, I hope you [00:35:00] had a couple ahas in there about yourself because man, I know I needed this message probably five years ago. It's one that took me way too long to learn as a leader. Retire that cape. It's not doing any of us any favors. Thank you for sharing that, Melissa. I am sure there are people that are like, .
Layci Nelson: I need more Melissa Hurrington in my life. Where can they find you?
Melissa Hurrington: It's Melissa Hurrington with a U, Hurrington. Message me, I'll respond to you as quickly as I am able to. I like to say that we keep it spicy, keep it real, and keep it fun on LinkedIn. So come have a good time and be surrounded by other people who are equally authentic and real and fun.
Layci Nelson: Yes. People run don't walk. It's great. I love it there Melissa, thank you for your time today. Thank you for coming on the show So appreciate it. I'd love to do this again in the future. Sounds good. Wonderful All right listeners, you got a lot to [00:36:00] think about and absorb I know i'm going to be soaking in this one for a while.
Layci Nelson: So until next time my friends go manage Like a leader
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